Nancy Umeh, a Nigerian nurse living abroad, has urged married men to actively support their wives’ personal and professional growth, emphasizing that women should advance in life just as their husbands do.
In a widely shared video, Nancy recounted an incident where a male social media user left derogatory remarks on her posts about her husband’s active involvement in parenting. The man dismissively labeled her spouse as a “houseboy” simply because he participates in childcare. Nancy expressed her shock not only at the comment but also at the number of women who endorsed the disrespectful opinion.
Addressing men who hold such views, Nancy passionately stated:
“Your wife has made immense sacrifices to carry on your family’s legacy, enduring the hardships of childbirth. If you, as a married man, are not achieving much, at the very least, ensure your wife is not left behind. She should be advancing alongside you.
This matters because a woman’s self-fulfillment is a key factor in her mental well-being, which in turn positively influences your children’s emotional health.”
Nancy further revealed that although her husband earns significantly more-about five times her income-he remains committed to her personal development so she can contribute meaningfully to their household. She explained her husband’s perspective on her growth:
“When we began our family, I took a pause in my career. While he was progressing, once our children started school, he encouraged me to think about my own ambitions. He said, ‘You’ve done the hard work of raising our kids; now let’s plan your path forward. You cannot be the only one moving ahead in this family.’
This is why many women feel resentment after decades of sacrifice-they look back and realize their time was devoted solely to the family.”
She also challenged the notion that men are “helping” their wives by participating in childcare:
“Caring for your children is not a favor or a chore that makes you a ‘houseboy.’ Many men don’t even know where the salt is in their own kitchen or how to bathe their kids. Someone’s time and effort are what keep the family moving forward. I urge men to dedicate their time and presence-not just financial support-to their children’s lives.”
Watch Nancy’s full message in the video below:
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